Believe it or not many mums are in a position that can become so unbearable they find it hard to cope as a parent. If you are a new mum or a mum with older children parenting does not always come easy sometimes.
As a parent you learn as you go on, but if you don’t nip problems in the bud as soon as possible then it can get worse as the children get older.
Here are a few instances you can relate to or know someone in a similar possition. How would you help someone in this difficult situation? What advice could you give to a parent pulling their hair? Out read on and see how these instances can be a cause for alarm.
- One mum screaming at baby in a cot shut up be quiet stop it!
- Child won’t do as he is told runs outside with a knife up a tree and won’t come down as the parent is yelling get here now!
- One mum smacks her child over and over again in temper!
This is my advice for any parent in a similar position.
A baby cries because it needs something. It’s the only way until it can talk to let you know its needs. If you have tried feeding, Bathing, Changing a nappy Depending on the age of a baby other underlying issues could be happing .At approx 3 months babies can get colic it happens at night, baby gets unsettled and no matter what you do nothing seems to work. Its like trapped wind and in some instances Gaviscon may be used by a doctor. So if you have tried everything and nothing seems to work consult your health visitor or doctor.
An older child will do naughty things to get a parent to notice them. Spending time with your child is not about buying them toys to keep them quiet or sitting them in front of a TV just to get some peace. Its quality time, listening to them and being interested in their conversation. Finding a hobby that the whole family can do together during the limited spare time you have. Its about having fun. Its isn’t good if you start to hate your kids! It means you are missing out so much of the love that a family can have together. It’s never too late, have a family meeting if its tearing the family apart and start from scratch. Build bridges, sit down and really listen to your child. They may be unhappy at school and need you to under stand they are hurting inside. Be there for them because children grow up ever so quickly.
Not everyone will agree with me here but a smack on the bottom is ok. If you start to lash out in temper over and over again its you as a parent that has lost control. You need to set the example about what a loving family is all about. You take your anger out when smacking a child over and over again. You end up coming off worse, as your hand is sore. You still end up screaming at each other and it has resolved nothing. The child runs off upstairs and screams back at you I hate you! Has the smacking in this instance done the trick NO because you may find your child is so upset they want to run away or stay locked in their bedroom and wont come down.
Why can I give this advice because children are a joy? I have had the experiences of being a mother to 3 grown up children a grandchild and a qualified working history for over 26 years with families and children from 0-8 years. I want you as a parent to go back to the drawing board so to speak and raise your children in such a way they are over the moon to have you as a parent. Plus the love you as a family will be so apparent other mums will want to take on board your advice for childrearing.
All the best keep safe in the snow from Sheila at Cheeky Chums.