mother in law says throw that baby bottle in the bin now!


baby in prone position lifting head and neck good support with pillow

mother in  law tells you to throw the baby’s bottle in the bin what do you do ?

dear Cheeky Chums …ld ignore her if baby was being feed only formula at a young age  but when is the right time and ditch the baby bottle and use a sippy cup?

As baby baby starts to get teeth come through start to wean onto a sippy cup. Around 6 moths old,but beware sterilize all parts up to the age of 12 months old. one because mums have been posting pictures and indepth photographs of whats hiding under the sippy cup lid of mold,germs ,dirt residue build up that most certainly is a place for bacteria to breed and will cause stomach upsets for your baby. And two because as your baby learns those first words the teeth can get pushed back making it difficult for your child to talk, the more your baby clings to a bottle the harder it will become to wean them off it.

with that being said 12 months is the time to ditch the bottle as more teeth fill baby’s mouth. more articles on babies here

May 4, 2016 at 9:36 pm Leave a comment

5 tips writing a blog about your horific birth and baby


5 tips writing a blog about your dramatic birth and your baby

blog readers want to know about the real you if you were hurting  during labour write about it . if The midwives were great at a particular hospital write about it write a couple blogs a week to gain more interest to your blog posts.

here are 5 tips to get you started in making an interesting blog about you and your baby readers will love to follow.

  • a picture says a thousand words use real photographs.
  • regular writing about your experience on your birth and baby gets more blog traffic than just posting once a month.
  • have a plan what will you cover maternity, parenting ,your baby’s milestones it will help inspire your blog post writing.
  • what’s the best baby products on the market that you have tried ?keeping it real will get more parents reading your blog
  • don’t forget to make full use of your blog including titles categories, tags where will you publish it upload a feed so many people will have access to your baby blog.


May 3, 2016 at 5:47 pm Leave a comment

lets have a laugh funny babies in videos

come on lets have a laugh funny babies in videos online take a look just below

look these babies are funny like our blog post if you agree


May 3, 2016 at 5:23 pm Leave a comment

baby died born 24 weeks 5 nice memorial gift ideas


does a preterm miscarriage baby loss have a funeral

baby died at 24 weeks 5 nice memorial gift ideas for the family

showing support for a baby’s family that has sadly died at 24 weeks of pregnancy can be very how to say sorry when it doesn’t seem enough, two the awkwardness you may feel in approaching them and three you want to buy them a gift for baby’s funeral but do not know what to choose.

here are some great ideas to show your love and compassion for them at this sad time when their baby died in the womb or shortly after birth.

  1. a rare to obtain hand made baby bereavement card that can be kept forever in a baby memorial box.
  2. ordering one of these you will be greatly appreciated by the family by Precious MemoriesTM baby loss jewellery mum can wear this close to heart lovingly forever.
  3. presenting dad or mum one of these to give to baby a micro or mini teddy bear to keep baby company for the funeral service these are so tiny most will fit in baby’s hand to hold forever. over 26 different ones to pick from.
  4. buy a star in honour of baby’s name.
  5. baby memorial bereavement boxes

May 1, 2016 at 8:07 pm Leave a comment

angel baby pictures photos babies


angel baby pictures photos babies to view online.

Angel babies are often referred to by name because they have passed away and are in heaven above with God ,Jesus and the angels. because of the sensitive nature of this blog post we will include some direct links to pay respect to the angel babies gone too soon.

Please be aware some babies that passed away may vary in skin colour and toning due to how long it has been since they passed away. If baby passed away a few weeks before birth known as a stillbirth for angel babies born asleep after 24 weeks skin breakdown would have started to happen as the natural process of death occurs. Therefore we air on the side of caution before you see any of these photographs and pictures of these precious babies.




April 29, 2016 at 7:10 pm Leave a comment

terrible twos stop my toddler being naughty


terrible twos how to stop my toddler being naughty please i’m desperate.

in todays society we leads such busy lives and a world so full of technology it may be the easiest thing to pass your two year old toddler your mobile phone or tablet to keep them occupied. toddlers under 3 soak up so much information in the brains this is such a valuable time of learning. Each day your toddler may seem naughty but as they try to learn to string words together can often become frustrated in telling you what they want .

here are 5 tips to help you understand your toddlers needs.

  • turn your phone of for at least 1 hour day to spend solely with your toddler.
  • get down on the floor with them for playtime building blocks having fun knocking them down you are also building relationships and your toddler is having quality time with you.
  • teach your toddler sign language so as they are picking up new words daily you can associate a new word with a sign ,your child will easily pick up the sign and will be less frustrated or naughty.
  • set boundaries that are age appropriate turning the light off making them sit in the dark is cruelty use 1 min per age in a naughty corner or naughty step as time out so a terrible two would have 2 mins maximum time out.
  • ignoring a tantrum if they are kicking out on the floor. if caught as soon as it happens you can often distract them into forgetting that they are having a tantrum.for example getting a book and talking out load saying oh wow this book is good look at the fishes swimming if they see you interested they will come running over to you to see what you are doing.



April 28, 2016 at 12:00 pm Leave a comment

born tiny newborn babies premature photos

born tiny newborn babies premature photos real infants

born tiny newborn babies that are poorly or very premature are cared for in a special care baby unit. here are some photos of some premature babies . you may be shocked as you see them with medical aids around them. These can include nasal feeding tubes, oxygen masks, plus intravenous lines too even on the top of baby’s scalp. Its because their little veins in premature babies are very fine. As baby grows very tiny babies need less specialist care in an incubator and eventually will be well enough just to wear full clothes bottle of breast feeding established before going home.





premature baby covered in vertix in incubator


April 27, 2016 at 12:01 pm Leave a comment

Premature baby loss does my baby have a funeral


does a premature baby born sleeping 23 weeks of pregnancy loss need a funeral service?

By law babies that have sadly died after 24 weeks of pregnancy have to have a funeral or cremation service in the UK. if your baby was born premature 23 weeks or less you can in deed still have a proper funeral service or even a cremation service.

The family can help with organising a premature baby loss funeral for you if everything seems to be a blur. It can be done through a funeral director working with you for your preferred plans.

what plans need to be made for a premature baby funeral ?

well its things like clothes to dress baby in to feel settled in the baby casket. Its a funeral or cremation service including church venue songs poems who will do a reading there or say a few words on babys brief life. what does the family plan to do with baby’s remains after ? in a family plot scattered with other babies in an unmarked grave or buying a new private plot ? or cremation with ashes kept at home to be buried later date .

April 21, 2016 at 7:57 pm Leave a comment

premature baby loss at less that 24 weeks funeral ?

stillbirth baby funeral prayerspremature baby loss at less that 24 weeks

do you need to have a funeral for a premature baby loss born before 24 weeks?

In the instance that baby was born premature before 24 weeks and died would not get a death certificate here in the UK. But it doesn’t mean you cannot arrange a funeral or cremation service.

here are some ideas you can do to create a memorial day to celebrate baby’s life however short he or she had with the family.

1. a balloon release immediate family can stand around a remembrance garden and release coloured balloons with helium inside. Write a message to baby in heaven tie it to a balloon.

2. A quiet little brook with a bridge make paper boats let them float on the water and go under the bridge to say a loving farewell.

3. a dove release at a crematorium or graveside they usually read a poem out for you.

4. create a photo video of scan pictures teddy bear etc play with some favourite lullaby music at a quiet family funeral service.

November 28, 2014 at 11:07 am Leave a comment

a fetal demise what is it in pregnancy

fetal demise what is it in pregnancy ?

some people talking on facebook about a pregnancy fetal demise so what is it ?

Not referred to as a miscarriage its called a fetal demise when no cardiac activity is detected, usually revealed at a scan appointment because its happened 20 weeks into pregnancy and beyond. Intrauterine fetal demise is the clinical term for the death of a baby in the uterus, during pregnancy and before birth. The term is usually used for pregnancy losses that happen after the 20th week of gestation.

a full document can be read here on fetal demise on prevention causes and care

November 27, 2014 at 9:06 pm Leave a comment

premature baby clothes ideas please 3lb babies sizes


premature babies nice clothes for 3lb babies

premature babies nice clothes for 3lb babies

premature baby clothes ideas please 3lb babies sizes

So many babies wearing the identical supermarket style premature baby clothes where can you turn to for ideas that offer individuality?

plain white sleepsuits boring! popper fastening vests? nope my baby is home now I don’t need the incubator clothes anymore !

so here are some colourful alternatives for babies weighing 3lb






for more designs with choices galore visit the online site here

November 23, 2014 at 11:14 am Leave a comment

keeping premature baby warm in winter

premature baby covered in vertix in incubator
keeping a premature baby warm in winter

When your premature baby is allowed home from hospital panic may kick in if you want to go visiting relatives. Will they have a cold? If your premature baby has been ill in hospital they can pick up infections quite easily and you don’t want them to go back in do you. IF in doubt ask before you visit avoid contact with anybody that’s has been ill recently such as sickness bug, chest infections etc.
In winter the weather will likely to get very cold so you can dress baby in a warm snuggly hat and a cosy coat too. for very small sizes you can find them here for girls and here for boys

November 19, 2014 at 2:03 pm Leave a comment

what to buy a 1 year old baby present gift

baby 1 birthday gift
what to buy a 1 year old baby present gift

Unsure what to buy for a baby age 1 year old as a present ?
You could ask the parents but if its a surprise that would be spoilt wouldn’t it so here are 5 ideas to brighten up a little baby’s face.
1. True representation books these are cardboard photo books which present everyday objects a 1 year old recognise, They can identify and learn to speak such as a Fork, Shoe, Puppy, Coat, cake is a great way to learn to repeat and say, understand and go and get.
2. wellington boots great for all weather types keeping socks nice and dry.
3. children song cds, to listen learn singalong to, dance and have fun
4.story books great for bedtime 1 and 1 quiet time for cuddles and bonding with family members.
5.Roleplay toys copying an adult they will often put mummys shoes on and trot around the house tea sets are fab,wooden fruit you can pretend to cut and slice and a big kitchen to make a pie yum.’

November 18, 2014 at 10:49 am Leave a comment

I blame my wife for our baby’s death miscarriage

I blame my wife for our baby’s death by miscarriage!

I feel really bad by telling my wife you killed our son. She was 34 weeks pregnant a scan revealed our baby son’s death happened whilst he was in the womb. She delivered our baby dead. I hated her for it my first child gone at only 34 weeks into her pregnancy. She ate something bad ? she didn’t sit down for her full pregnancy, I blamed my wife and I shouldn’t have.
It nearly broke us apart whist we waited for him to be delivered. I thought it was her fault alone that my baby son died, but I was wrong a knot in the cord caused his death. I apologised deeply to my wife we clung to each other for support. We joined a local group on Facebook and each day gets better.

November 17, 2014 at 6:48 pm Leave a comment

1st babys birthday bash ideas one year old first party?

first birthday party

first birthday party

1st babys birthday bash ideas one year old first party?
Your baby’s first birthday wow how fast has that gone?
You will be so pleased you’ll want to shout it to the whole world. So what did you have in mind to celebrate? A huge party for baby to enjoy? Well if you really want it to be baby appropriate here are 5 tips ideas that wont break the bank balance.

1. depending on the weather ask a few babies to attend from the local playgroup or family members or nursery even to attend a teddy bears picnic, healthy snacks huge blanket ask them to bring a teddy toy and a cute first birthday cake. A large room will suffice move all the furniture on a rainy day.

2.Puppets show daddy’s way get the family all sitting on comfy cushions on the floor get daddy to sing funny songs using baby’s favourite cuddly toys. Acting out a little story for baby to enjoy.

3.Family get together invite close family members video the event opening presents do a light buffet with a great first baby birthday cake take loads a photos for a photo album give each family a picture to keep afterwards.

4.Book day for babies buy loads of books baby related ask a few baby friends over let the babies look at books together having fun ,if you have space in the kitchen,roll out a huge piece of wall paper and using non toxic paints let the babies run and make footprints.

5.take baby out to a safe fun play centre have a birthday cake even ask a few baby friends over, older kids will take over and spoilt it if its just older children who attend.

July 21, 2014 at 1:56 pm Leave a comment

My Cousins babies are naughty should I let my baby play with them

Nice baby with toysmy cousins babies are naughty should i let my baby play with them?

My baby boy is 9 months and my cousin’s twin babies are 11 months born 8 weeks premature, they cry a lot and I don’t want my baby to be naughty like them should I take him to her house to play she keeps asking me to go and visit ?

juggling twin babies is Hard her babies just seem to be more noisy because there are 2 of them demanding mums attention at once. they are also adjusted age of 9 months like your own baby. The more babies mix with babies of the own age (peers) the better they becoming in learning valuable social skills. Their speech will come on as they learn to babble at each other, communication begins with sharing toys with each other and problem solving as they learn to play with each others toys.I’ts a good idea for babies to mix as they also to build up immunity against illnesses too.

July 20, 2014 at 7:52 pm Leave a comment

11 month baby screams too much shall I take him playgroup?

my 11 month old baby screams too much shall I take him playgroup?

Nice baby with toysDear Cheeky Chums my baby keeps having paddies and screams when I leave the room, is it a good thing to get out and take him to a local church playgroup?
Our reply
It is a good thing to get out and about, a local playgroup for babies and toddlers will work wonders and here’s 5 reasons why you should.
1. you baby will learn to develop valuable social skills with not only adults but its peers and older toddlers too.
2. Your baby will learn to communicate by talking, making sounds developing new sounds and saying first words as her learns to mix and copy other babies at play, plus playgroups sing songs too usually throughout or at the end of a session and are really good fun for you to join in too. Then you can repeat them at home as you get used to new songs rhymes and short stories which in turn will help baby develop even more language skills at home.
3.What a wide variety of new experiences and valuable play lessons he will learn as he picks up and . interesting and many new different toys to explore through play.
4. you too will mix with other parents to share your experiences, tips and exchange ideas with.
5.As he learns to play and find his favourite play toys it will give you a better idea what to buy for the first birthday gift coming up.

April 24, 2014 at 7:08 pm Leave a comment

Premature babies in special care long term gift ideas

premature baby covered in vertix in incubatorPremature babies in special care for the long term gift ideas please

A newborn baby gets many gifts and many family members or friends can find it ever so easy to buy that special baby gift. A baby that’s arrived very early or born very premature can be much harder to buy for, seeing most items for babies start from newborn size. So here are 3 great gift ideas that the mum and dad will really appreciate for their tiny baby.the baby may have many more weeks to be cared for in special care and it can be for quite a while yet to concider buying a newborn sized outfit.
a very small teddy bear buy one less than 15cm in height this is the first great gift idea for a premature baby, it can sit beside the incubator keeping baby company yet the size will not be too overpowering sitting near by.
gift idea number 2 is a premature baby hat in funky colours sizes at cheeky chums online start from 12cm wow that’s idea 3 a preemie milestone book that mum or dad can tick off as baby gets one step closer to coming home.

April 23, 2014 at 2:21 pm Leave a comment

keeping baby safe and happy 3-6 months play

baby in prone position lifting head and neck good support with pillow

baby in prone position lifting head and neck good support with pillow

keeping baby safe and happy 3-6 months playtime

So your baby is growing becoming more interested in his or her surroundings and wanting to explore. What play time activities do you think they will enjoy patting your tablet or mobile phone?

Today we look at 5 easy play ideas that keep baby safe, happy, amused and exploring the big wide world around him,which too will help  to encourage brain growth and reach the next developmental milestones.

  1. Hold baby on your knee,looking at you sitting facing you.recognizing both of you as you can take it in turns singing nursery songs  with repetitive rhyme.
  2. laying on a blanket on the floor touch and feel soft cuddly toys and toys that jingle as they are touched.
  3. Sitting in a bouncy chair with rattle toys across the front.
  4. Supported with cushions for back support Holding a rag toy book with crinkles squeaks and different fabrics.
  5. Lying in a cot with a musical cot mobile over head.

January 17, 2014 at 8:48 pm Leave a comment

Pregnancy loss Miscarriage 1st trimester is there a funeral

does a preterm miscarriage baby loss have a funeral

does a preterm miscarriage baby loss have a funeral

Pregnancy loss Miscarriage 1st trimester is there a funeral for baby?

Most miscarriages in the 1st trimester can be lost as a mum goes to the toilet and fluid, blood loss and tissue can easily be flushed away by accident down the loo. Its then only after a scan that it can be noticed that baby is no longer in the womb growing.

In the UK A funeral can take place for  any gestational age with some tissue samples buried as a recognition of baby’s loss.The institute of cemetary and cremation management will also cremate remains in  a private plot or shared plot and encourages sensitive disposal irrespective of gestation period see the attached recommendation leaflet for more detail

By law in the UK There has to be a cremation or funeral with a death certificate for babies born after 24 weeks completed gestation age of pregnancy.Any pregnancy loss can have a funeral service or memorial service if the family request it .

January 14, 2014 at 4:17 pm Leave a comment

premature baby feet Do premature babies wear shoes

new baby royal babiespremature baby feet Do premature babies wear shoes ?

A Premature baby does not need shoes. Parents and family members may like to purchase soft cotton shoes or booties but not hard wearing walking shoes. You wont find shoes for premature babies like 1 year old babies wear. the skin of a premature baby is very fragile and therefore it is best to dress in socks and booties to go out in the pram once home from hospital and in the car seat visiting family and friends. Do not be tempted to buy tight fitting patent doll shoes or leather dolls shoes .The last thing you want is be the cause of damaging tender feet of a premature baby just to be in with the latest fashions.

here are some examples of premature baby soft shoes and booties 

cotton shoes for tiny babies born premature

cotton shoes for tiny babies born premature

Cute hand knitted premature babies shoes booties and mittens

Cute hand knitted premature babies shoes booties and mittens

knitted baby booties shoes for tiny babies born premature

knitted baby booties shoes for tiny babies born premature

soft premature baby shoes booties

soft premature baby shoes booties

premature babies shoes

premature babies shoes

January 12, 2014 at 8:15 pm Leave a comment

Premature Birth Premature babies 0-5 years

Nice baby with toysPremature Birth Premature babies 0-5 years

happy new year to readers past present and new. A Big welcome to our blog for 2014. It was a busy month in December 2013 so we didn’t have much time to post many posts on our Cheeky Chums babies blog.too many orders to prepare for premature baby clothing.

So whats in store for our premature baby blog in 2014.

we will be topic based for each day we post.

Blog Posts on Monday Birth, Babies 0-6 month

Tuesday infant Blog posts will be on Babies ,Toddlers Children and kids 1-3 years FAQ ask a question day .

Wednesday Blog posts Premature babies, research into premature births, whats new! sneak peaks of whats coming soon for tiny premature babies and any important news headlines of the week

Thursday babies blog posts will look child development  0-5 year.

 Friday baby blog posts will cover  Question and Answer day  baby loss infant,neonatal bereavement and miscarriage related areas for discussion.

Weekend blog posts will be multiple pregnancy, Multiple babies posting funny videos, share your stories looking after a large family, Twins Triplets and more 0-5 years related.

January 2, 2014 at 9:35 pm Leave a comment

teaching babies toddlers Yes No! right from wrong

 ???????????????????????????????????????teaching babies and toddlers Yes and No! right from wrong
0 – 1 YEAR At this stage in life, the concepts of right and wrong are not possible to teach as they are just developing their brain and exploring their surroundings . A baby  who is shown warmth, cuddling and loving attention is likely to grow into a healthy and happy adult than one that is screamed at or smacked  or even beaten under 1 because they have not done as they are told.
In the bible in Proverbs 22 : verse 6  it says “Train up  a child in the way  he should go: and when he is old,  he will not depart  from it.”
So as parents what you teach your child will stay with them as they get older.
Instilling good qualities in the way we act as parents can have a dramatic effect on their upbringing, ie showing Kindness,Love, Gentleness,Sincerity.Patience.
Or screaming swearing shouting hitting, smashing plates across the room can all be picked up and learned from adults and imitated by young children.
1 – 2 YEARS Rather than scolding a child or arguing with him about misbehaviour, try to take preventative measures beforehand. If you don’t want him pulling things out the cupboards, make sure they are secured. At this age of short attention span, discipline beyond a simple “no” is unnecessary and can have undesirable effects.
2 – 4 YEARS Children of this age, unable to understand abstractions such as generosity and truth, imitate their parents. So set an example. Be firm in disallowing undesirable behavior, but do so in a kind and friendly manner, without attempting to explain why.
4 – 6 YEARS This is the time where you can really take some positive steps to reinforce your child’s positive behavior. Give him lots of praise when it’s due. Children of this age respond well to simple reasoning and explanations. Concepts such as truthfulness and generosity can be introduced. Continue to set an example of acceptable behavior. The child at this stage wants to please you and wants to be liked by others.
5 – 8 YEARS Children develop a greater social awareness at this age. They understand the basic rights of others when taught fairness, values and the need to follow certain rules of behavior. Rules and limitations not only seem just to the child, but give him a good feeling of security.
8 – 11 YEARS Due to natural growth and influences outside the home, your child has likely become more independent. He may begin to question your decisions, contradict or argue. You must remain firm in the important matters and flexible in less important ones. Demonstrate and discuss the child’s duties and responsibilities to friends, relatives and society. Set examples of moral behavior. Sex education can also be important at this stage.
12 – 17 YEARS These are normally rebellious years for most teenagers. In fact, teenagers who never rebel are probably in emotional trouble. As a parent you must weather the storm when your teenager begins to question and test conventional values, rules and beliefs. If you’ve instilled a sense of values at an early age, chances are he still retains many of those ideas. Try to keep lines of communication open and don’t push the panic button. If communication does break down and tensions mount considerably, seek professional help.

December 13, 2013 at 11:07 am Leave a comment

Tiny Baby bereavement clothes My Passion My story


reborn dolls used in all photo shoots not real tiny babies

Tiny Baby bereavement clothes My Passion My story

Way back in 2007 a lady came into our shop and asked if we had any baby clothes for a 2lb baby (a tiny family member that had sadly passed away). At the time we even stocked dolls clothes and we didn’t have anything to offer. I watched as the rest of the family came in to browse through the small baby clothes but they had to leave empty handed.

That image  never left me, the sadness on their faces as they left with nothing, our shop was the last one they tried.. So I said I would make sure no one would ever leave without having suitable tiny baby clothes to fit,especially for  the sad occasion that a tiny baby sadly passes away.

Gradually having l found there was no baby clothes to fit these very tiny precious babies. I learned to sew.Way back then we made baby clothes for babies 1lb,2lb,3lb in weight. What I found was babies under 24 weeks had nothing to wear. A midwife rang me and said she will never forget the horror of passing  a tiny baby born sleeping to mum on a tray because there was nothing else suitable.

Now in 2013 our range is the biggest in the UK for baby bereavement clothes for very tiny babies, even for the little ones born under 24 weeks of pregnancy. We even have tiny teddy bears from 3cm in length that will fit perfectly into the tiny hand of a baby to treasure forever.

Opening until 11pm at night so parents can order anytime. 24 hour ordering on the internet with special delivery options for a quicker dispatch.  We also provide to hospitals throughout the UK and Europe .

Our bereavement department can be found at


December 12, 2013 at 10:01 pm Leave a comment

Death how to tell the children tactfully

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????Death how to tell the children tactfully


For most children, their first experience with grief comes with the death of a beloved family pet. When Zoe the eight-week old puppy dies of parvovirus or Tweety the budgie stops singing his morning song, a child experiences profound and lasting loss for the first time in their young lives.

Children want and need to know about death, yet we are often reluctant ? even squeamish ? when talking about it. Conversations with kids about death can be extremely difficult, but they are so important. Helping children understand the death of their pet may arm them with the skills they need to cope and grieve effectively when someone they love dies. Everyone experiences a sense of shock when death occurs, and this is especially true for children. They have no prior experience, and usually no information to help them comprehend what “dead forever” means.

Death and grief are extremely difficult human emotions, therefore, there is no right or wrong way to deal with death. As adults, our reactions to death are a product of societal attitudes and the beliefs and culture of the family from which we came.

When a family member dies, children express their grief differently depending on their age. An infant may become irritable and fussy. A pre-schooler lives in a magical world, so death isn?t permanent for them. They may alternate between seeing death as temporary and reversible to understanding that death is forever. Children ages six to 12 have a more mature understanding of death and teenagers have an adult understanding of death, but has fewer coping skills.

Let?s look at Justin?s first experience with death:

Justin?s is 5 years old and lives with his mom and dad and brand new sister Sarah. One morning, Justin wakes up to mom?s tears and runs to Sarah?s room to find mommy and daddy crying. Daddy ushers Justin out of the room and tells him quietly that Sarah isn?t going to wake up today.

Justin is scared and confused. Justin has never seen Daddy cry. Dad is his hero. He makes Justin feel safe. What could be so horrible that it would make Daddy cry? Daddy spends the morning talking to Justin while mom and Grandma Jane go in and out of the house, crying and Sarah is taken away by strange people that Justin does not know.

After lunch, Justin goes to Sarah?s room to look for her. They always take an afternoon nap together. But Sarah isn?t there. ?When will Sarah be home?? Justin asks his daddy. Daddy holds Justin as he tells him ?Sarah won?t be coming home, honey, Sarah has died. She stopped breathing and her heart stopped beating. We?re all so very sad. Why don?t we sit together and remember some of the funny things she used to do.? Justin turns his blue eyes to look at Daddy ?No, it?s okay Daddy. She?ll be home later.?

As the days go on from the time of Sarah?s death, mom and dad are caught up in funeral preparations and Justin continues in his insistence that his sister will come home. As family gathers and the days get closer to the services his parents remain with growing concern for his belief.

Parents should be aware of normal childhood responses to a death in the family. It is normal during the weeks following the death for some children to feel immediate grief or persist in the belief that the family member is still alive. But long-term denial of the death or avoidance of grief is unhealthy and can later surface in more severe problems. Once children accept the death, they are likely to display their feelings of sadness on and off over a long period of time, and often at unexpected moments. The surviving relatives should spend as much time as possible with the child, making it clear that the child has permission to show his or her feelings openly or freely.

Parents with children experiencing grief should: ? Provide age-appropriate information regarding the loss ? Give the child space for them to emote. (Encouragement to discuss his or her innermost fantasies, fears, thoughts, and feelings.) ? Be aware of their own emotional availability: Your child needs someone who will listen. Reach our for support from others if you are unable to provide that support to your child at this time.

Warning signs include: ? changes in sleep, appetite, school performance, or social interaction ? verbal/non-verbal messages of wanting to join the deceased (drawings, behaviors, or statements) Keep In Mind: Children need to be assured that death is not the end?that love never dies. Just because the person is no longer living, doesn’t mean we don’t still love them. You are the expert of your child and always reach for assistance from a professional if you have any questions.

December 9, 2013 at 8:04 pm Leave a comment

3 year child and baby should we go swimming ?

domestic violence??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????3 year child and baby should we go swimming ?
Should you enroll your child in swim lessons or teach them yourself?

Have you thought about teaching your child swimming yourself? Here are Pros & Cons to consider before making this decision.
I am a very strong proponent of structured group swim lessons. I do not have children myself, but have encouraged all my siblings & friends to enroll their children in swim lessons. I have had my own nieces & nephews in my group lessons and have never given any private lessons. With this said I do understand that only parents know what is best for their child, so I will give the pros & cons of both sides of this question & leave it to you to decide what is best.

Structured swim lessons
Experienced Instructors
Authoritative figure that the child will listen to
Group setting – child not always center of attention
Good “peer pressure”
Structured Schedule
Proper Equipment
Safe Setting with Trained Guards
Unfamiliar People
Unfamiliar Setting
Inconvenient Schedule
Health Issues – Allergic to chlorine/ beach water

Teaching Swim Lesson Yourself
Flexible Scheduling
Great Existing Relationship for Teacher/Student
Knowledge of Child’s Learning Methods
Individual Attention
Child too Comfortable/ May Not Listen
Lacking Water Site & Teaching Tools
Inexperience in Teaching Swimming
I hope the info above helps you weigh your swim lessons options for your child. Though it can be difficult to “unteach” some learned swim skills there is always the option of enrolling your child in lessons if your individual instruction did not produce the desired results. No matter which decision you make, having your child learning to swim is always a Win – Win situation.

Andy Murray is the founder of , as well as a Red Cross certified swim instructor. He has been teaching swim lessons for 15 years and coaching youth swim team for more then 5 years.

December 7, 2013 at 6:00 pm Leave a comment

5 winter warmer meals for babies 1- 2 year old

Baby food, baby eating5 winter warmer meals for babies 1- 2 year old

for those of you who love to make  your baby’s own meals or do a lot of home cooking here are 5 meal ideas for the Winter weather to keep you all warm and less hungry.

  • pea and ham soup with crusty home made bread rolls add cooked potatoes to thicken soup too.
  • rich strew use Atora suet light to make low fat dumplings with stewing beef, carrots and suede, parsnips add 2 beef oxo cubes thicken with cornflour and serve with jacket potatoes.
  • pasta with cooked broccoli and cauliflower and cheese sauce  mix all together and serve with breadcrumbs on top in a pie dish.
  • fish pie add cod pieces, prawns salmon pieces add a parsley sauce mix,with mashed potatoes on top serve with mixed vegetables.
  • bish bash bosh chicken ,add cooked chicken, sweetcorn, mushrooms with a tin of mushroom  or use chicken soup put in a pie dish add a pastry crust bake in oven serve with potatoe wedges.

December 6, 2013 at 4:00 pm Leave a comment

Bored young kids cold Winter cheerful children fun at home

hBored kids under 5 cold Winter cheerful children at home

Children have amazing and wild imaginations. The next time you hear “I’m bored in the Winter time” or “What can we do”, give them a few household items, or let them make their own and watch them expand into endless hours of fun and entertainment. The following are just a few ideas to get the fun started and be sure to use your imagination too!

—>Make an Obstacle Course Obstacle courses can be a lot of fun, spark creativity and also be great exercise for the little ones. These can be set up in and out of doors. Pillows, chairs, tires and stools are just a couple of things that can be used to be climbed, jumped and skipped over, through, around and under. Time each child as they scramble their way through and have a race. Best thing about these is that once they’ve done everything they can think of with the first one, it can be torn down and set up again another way. Have each child take turns in choosing the way it’s set back up.

—>Let’s Play Dress Up Don’t give away all those old shoes, shirts, pants, hats, gloves and costume jewelry! Set aside a special drawer or box for these item to play dress up. Have children act out their favorite play, television show or put on a fashion show. You’d be surprised exactly how cute she really looks in your old high school prom gown. Be sure to take snap shots or keep the video camera rolling!

—>Kid’s Cafe set up a small  table and let the children play restaurant. Have children make up or use play money and menus. Children that can’t write yet can draw the food items on the menus. Give them some paper plates, cups, plastic silverware, a little notebook and they’re open for business. Take turns being waiter, customer and busboy (or girl ).

—>Go Camping This too can be played in or out of doors and the possibilities are endless. If you have a smaller pop-up tent, it can be set up in the living room. If you’re taking this activity outdoors, you can hang an old sheet over a clothesline securing with rocks at the bottom. Have children draw or cut out windows if you’re using an old sheet. (Remember to keep for the next camping trip.) Set up some lawn chairs around your faux fire and tell stories, sing songs, make smores in the microwave or any other favorite camping activity. Go all the way and sleep there tonight!

December 5, 2013 at 11:30 am Leave a comment

Domestic Abuse Violence my young children are a wreck

children playingDomestic Abuse my young children are a wreck

Children who witnesses domestic violence against his or her parent is a victim of domestic violence as well. Approximately five million children witness domestic violence in their homes each year. A child may be a witness to his or her parent being emotionally abused, physically abused, economically abused and/or even sexually abused.

No matter how hard a parent tries to shield their child from the abuse he or she receives from an abusive partner, the child usually knows what is occurring. Even a young infant can tune into the tension and emotional feelings of his or her mother.

Most children will experience problems if they live in a violent home and witness a parent being abused. Children who witness abuse are more inclined to have behavior and emotional problems. Some children will develop psychosomatic disorders. This may include bed-wetting, school problems, night terrors, stuttering, excessive fear and crying. Children may experience depression, suicidal behaviors and phobias if they are kept in a violent household.

Older children may blame themselves for the abuse a parent receives. Older children may even step into the abuse to direct the attention onto themselves and off of the battered parent. There is a great risk that children who witness abuse may grow up thinking that violence is the only means to resolve emotional and relationship conflicts. Boys who grow up in an abusive home are more likely to batter their future partners versus boys who grow up in a nonviolent home. Children who have witnessed abuse to a parent are also more likely to drink alcohol and abuse drugs.

Children who live in a domestically violent home will suffer some form of neglect, be it physical or emotional. It isn’t always just the mother who is abused, but the children may be abused as well. Many adults who were abused when they were children report that witnessing the abuse to their mother was harder for them to deal with then the abuse they personally received.

December 4, 2013 at 10:29 pm Leave a comment

Early Infant pregnancy loss information






Early Infant pregnancy loss information

this blog post contains information about infant loss if it is likely to cause any upset please press your back button now.

Over the last few weeks we have been adding some new valuable information on tiny infant loss such as baby funeral planning, baby bereavement card poems causes of an infant fetal demises etc.There is a lot of information covered ,useful facts  including what happens if you have a miscarriage at home and the UK laws  on  burying a premature baby etc. and more related topics will be covered over the next few weeks

choose a topic here to see if the question you need answering is covered

you can also type in the search box the baby bereavement website as an alternative way to see other information  such as support groups for infant loss,funeral songs ideas list UK  funeral directors and lots more.main website address is

November 18, 2013 at 3:34 pm Leave a comment

Baby Maternity Unit for poorly premature babies

Baby Maternity Unit for poorly premature babies

as today is premature baby awareness day we thought you may like to see some preemie babies and how very tiny they are,if the are delivered early before 37 weeks which is classed as premature. you can follow our Pinterest boards as we regularly add photos of premature babies born at 22-24 weeks 25-28 weeks 29-30 weeks -32-35 weeks 35-37 weeks gestation and there are also a lot of contact sites you can add yourself  you to have a premature baby.

533256_440321696007117_22252445_n   bigstockphoto_Premature_Baby_1588512






premature baby covered in vertix in incubator

November 17, 2013 at 4:41 pm Leave a comment

what a nuisance babies at play 0 – 6 months baby toys

what a nuisance babies at play 0 – 6 months baby toys

How many teddies can you pile up into a baby’s bedroom?

well if you think of a family member buying  a present a cute teddy is often the first thing that  comes to mind when deciding what toys to buy the new baby. before long baby can have tons all collecting dust that often can be a problem with some babies getting asthma from a very young age. So what other baby toys can you buy for babies around the 0-6 months age.

well here are a few pointers these suggestions will be good for encouraging baby development  milestones , appropriate age of learning toys,toys that wont get thrown away due to lost pieces or a toys that are good value without being a waste of money.

Nice baby with toys

  • teething rings,small rattles that a baby can learn to grasp in the hand, from  around 4 months ,mouthing takes place too when a child will put anything to its mouth to  explore the texture, do not discourage this behavior its natural part of development unless another child as given a dangerous item for the baby to hold toddlers especially.



  • Brightly coloured pram toys that stretch across the pram with various sounds such as musical,squeaks,rattles,crinkle sounds.Rattle





  • musical toys for over babies cot that pull to activate music,cot mobiles.


November 15, 2013 at 8:50 pm Leave a comment

Your new baby 5 amazing things newborn babies can do

561819_452506461454381_1621164900_nYour new baby 5 amazing things newborn babies can do

believe it or not a newborn baby can step up, and more but these are called primary reflex actions. The baby doctor does a quick check when baby is born to make sure all is well and these reflexes are present.

There is reflex standing,reflex walking on a flat surface but these disappear before 6 months old and should not be mistaken for baby can actually walk properly already.This comes later around 12-14 months old.

sucking and rooting reflex unless the baby has just been fed.

Can pull to sit reflex,moro refex like a startled reflex and ventral suspension.

plus a strong palmar grasp present too. truly amazing isn’t it.

November 8, 2013 at 6:40 pm Leave a comment

baby led weaning babies what is it?

Baby food, baby eatingbaby led weaning babies what is it?

2 methods one is letting baby tell you when it needs moving onto solids for example instead of weaning at 4 months wait until baby seems really hungry and ready to move on. do not leave weaning baby way after 6 months or baby will have problems weaning from liquid-semi liquid to lumpy foods in the long term.

the other method of baby lead weaning is waiting until baby is 6 months old and giving huge pieces of food direct to eat such as a pork chop, piece ,half a  banana  a chunky crust of bread to chomp on. this method cuts out the mush type foods completley.

personally i think the first method is best as i have seen too many babies at 9-12 months choke of chunks of raw apple carrot etc.

November 1, 2013 at 8:00 am Leave a comment

3 silly baby questions and weird facts about babies

Depositphotos_27338421_xs3 silly but weird facts about babies

  1. dear Cheeky chums my newborn baby’s poo was dark brown at birth now its yellow the week after i’m breastfeeding is this normal? yes the first poop that a baby has is called meconium.then it changes colour as milk is introduced as a first food so not to worry.
  2. Dear Cheeky chums my boy friend wants to know when can our 3 month baby have solid foods such as chips and burgers. babies at birth have a sucking reflex then as they get used to using their muscles for swallowing the first solid foods have to be slightly thicker than milk to start with.A baby has to learn the new skills of sucking from a spoon,trying different tastes and introducing healthy food items to baby’s diet ,then gradually moving on to semi liquidized baby foods then moving on to tiny lumps with in the first year.You’ll also find baby around 9 months will love to hold and munch on a bananas  or bread chunks. avoid giving babies fatty food items such as burgers and chips.
  3. why can’t a baby walk at 6 months? Babies have to develop strong muscle tones and other large motor skills in order to progress from sitting,standing walking with furniture then onto walking takes a few months grow, and develop,by introducing healthy foods, stimulation through play,rest and sleep and a nurtured environment for baby to reach any baby milestone. leave a baby in  a cot or playpen to play all day and baby will learn nothing, become weak ,fail to thrive so to speak and then be delayed with milestones that should come on during the first year.

October 31, 2013 at 6:57 pm Leave a comment

Pregnancy loss baby memorials who do you buy for ?

hPregnancy loss  baby memorials who do you buy for ?

Dear Cheeky Chums my friend lost her baby in pregnancy at 24 weeks and my mum said i should buy a baby memorial what is  it and should I  not be buying it for the mum I’m confused ?

First of all you can send mum a bereavement card acknowledging the loss of her baby in memory of baby.  depending where baby is buried or cremated and final laid to rest determines what baby memorial gift you want to buy. it could be a toy windmill that blows naturally in the wind for the graveside if its privately owned but sometimes a communal grave that  hospitals bury all the little ones together in, do not have the space for individual memorial items to be placed there.

you could buy mum some memorial jewelry with little feet on or a heart shaped locket necklace, there are many website that offer memorial gifts like this online.

and for the whole family why not write poem and choose an appropriate frame that can be kept on a fireplace or beside cabinet for a more personal memorial gift.


October 29, 2013 at 11:00 am Leave a comment

I’m pregnant Top 5 Pregnancy Tips for Last Trimester

SONY DSCTop 5 Pregnancy Tips for Last Trimester

tips every where for pregnancy so today we shall look at the best ones for being pregnant in the last few weeks.

  • don’t leave painting baby’s bedroom in the last week due to any lingering paint fumes .
  • If you develop high blood pressure in pregnancy don’t ignore it ,tell your midwife at the next antenatal visit.
  • don’t leave packing your bag too late just because you cant be bothered babies come anytime even early occasionally.
  • don’t stand too long in the shopping queues at the end of your pregnancy especially in the last few weeks of December if you can, shop online to avoid feeling faint with the mad rush of shoppers.
  • make a Birth plan BUT don’t be surprised if it all changes when you actually go in labour for example don’t be hard on your self if  you opt for epidural because you thought you could handle any sort of pain then change your mind,or you want all natural but baby doesnt take to labour pain and needs a quick c section.

October 28, 2013 at 6:46 pm Leave a comment

pregnant maternity clothes what do you wear in pregnancy?

th_PREG5pregnant maternity clothes what do you wear in pregnancy?

In pregnancy as your baby bump gets bigger you may consider  buying maternity clothes but what items are available ? what do you need most ? and where can you buy maternity clothing from?

  • your bra size may go up  sizes especially towards the end of pregnancy so opt for one that gives you good support across the back.
  • free flowing blouses are a good idea so they aren’t tight and clinging.
  • maternity jeans are an excellent buy as the belly area is made with soft jersey or ribbed cotton fabric for support and comfort that doesn’t dig into your growing waistline.
  • you  get maternity dresses flowing loose fitting ones or even flattering off the bump for all your friend to see and admire.

then there is the nursing maternity range which you only need if you intend to breast feed our baby. The nursing range are tops that open easily to breast feed baby, bras that open on the shoulder,nighties that have buttons at the front for easily feeding in the maternity hospital.

Before traveling for many hours to find maternity clothes shops look on line such as Debenhams, Next ,H+M and Vertbaudet  to save wasting time traveling to be told we don’t sell them anymore


October 28, 2013 at 6:00 pm Leave a comment

miscarriage baby loss under 24 weeks what can baby wear?

000_2124miscarriage baby loss under 24 weeks what can baby wear ?

today is infant loss awareness day this week we have been answering your questions today we look at what you baby can wear that as sadly passed away born under 24 weeks into pregnancy.

Ordering babies full term clothes, no problem ! lots of cute clothes that fit .When it comes to tiny babies you will find it a struggle for babies under 24 weeks. dolls clothes are not  comfortable or suitable for a baby burial you may get free knitted donations given but a mum would still prefer her baby to be dressed in proper baby clothes.

there is a suitable alternative clothes shop that specializes in the very tiny sizes and for babies born under 24 weeks .In fact the range in the baby bereavement section or baby clothes increases regularly . They have all you need to dress baby from top to toe including babygrows baby gowns, knitted layette sets, nappies and little pouches for the smallest baby too fragile for dressing (born under 18 weeks). see the main baby bereavement department here

October 15, 2013 at 8:02 pm Leave a comment

what gift ideas to buy for a stillborn baby funeral?

hwhat gift ideas to buy for a stillborn baby funeral ?

5 gift ideas that will mean a lot to the grieving parents after their baby died due to being born stillborn.

    • The Great North Museum: Hancock’s hugely popular Butterfly Wall fundraising campaign has been re-launched. The first campaign,

    A beautiful butterfly would make a unique and thoughtful gift for a family member or friend. Why not mark a special occasion by adding to our growing kaleidoscope of butterflies? Sponsoring a butterfly will also help to support activities for children and young people at the Great North Museum: Hancock. You will receive a special Gift Card and the butterflies themselves will be on display at the Great North Museum: Hancock

    If you would like to support this incredibly important aspect of our work and include your name (or the name of someone you love) on our beautiful Butterfly Wall please make a donation today! Our suggested donation is £25 or more*.

    contact us on (0191) 277 2196 or email We would be delighted to speak to you.

  • make a donation in memory of baby or raise funds directly with the families local SANDS group.
  • Buy some artificial flowers for the baby’s graveside rather than fresh ones which don’t last long.
  • Ask the local maternity department what item can you buy for the bereavement room for example a relaxing candle with in memory of baby’s name written on the side .or relaxing colours fresh sheets for a lady’s bed.
  • the charity we are working with for 2013-2014 is Bear for an Angel why not donate a bear in memory of baby’s name for a child that has died up the age of 16 .

October 13, 2013 at 7:34 pm Leave a comment

FETAL ANOMALY i dont want a termination is it law to make me

61447_10151094690256930_791562549_nis it the law to have  termination / abortion  if you don’t want one if baby has been diagnosed with a poor outcome prognosis.

In the UK No it is not the law to make you have an abortion or termination if your pregnancy scan diagonalized a fetal anormally. time is of the essence as medical staff only have a few weeks to make you decide quickly . Abortion these days is often presented as the only way forward.

Sometimes the way your’e told to abort the pregnancy can make you feel bullied to doing something you would normally never want to consider.

Telling the doctors and medical staff No to a termination

just because a  baby with fetal abnormality may not be able to spend your entire life with you doesn’t mean you can’t spend their entire life with them.

You are the mother of the baby take courage be strong and say no and leave without them giving you any medication to take over the weekend which will abort the baby .This will give you a real sense of freedom like saying no to a cigarette when you have decide to quit smoking.

This will then give you the liberty to say no again to yourself  and anyone else because you have done it once already.

a good site to follow is


October 12, 2013 at 2:12 pm Leave a comment

Baby Loss Aware Miscarriages and fetal demise

children playing








Baby Loss Aware Miscarriages and fetal demise

this week is baby loss awareness week up to the 15th of October.this weeks blog posts will answer some  of the worrying questions associated with infant loss.

If you find it too upsetting please press your back button now.

Topics : will cover

  • is it the law to have  abortion if you don’t want one if baby has been diagnosed with a poor outcome prognosis.
  • what gift ideas to buy for a baby funeral?
  • looking at infant funeral thankyou notes what to put.
  • death certificates for a miscarriage.
  • infant baby bereavement clothes what to buy?

check back everyday as we cover each one  of the lists.


October 10, 2013 at 6:58 pm Leave a comment

infant pillow support mum + baby gets comfortable

Baby food, baby eating

infant pillow support mum + baby gets comfortable

what can you use an infant support pillow for?

important fact first …NOT for babies under 1 year old at nap time or bedtime for sleeping.

  • you can use a premature baby infant support pillow in an incubator.
  • use an infant support pillow for a baby learning to support the head in a prone position to develop good muscle tone.


  • use a baby support pillow in the back of a high chair when baby  learning to sit up.
  • use an infant support pillow for family photographs as props and to position baby better.
  • great for playtime on the floor with toys around and an infant support pillow comes in  all shapes and sizes.

Baby lying on pillow

  • mums can feel comfortable breastfeeding baby surrounded by an infant support pillow too.

October 9, 2013 at 8:34 pm Leave a comment

lonely little boy at nursery 7 tips to help his self esteem


hThe 7 key secrets to building self-esteem in your little boy

Definition of self-esteem

The concept of self-esteem is based on our ability to think well about ourselves and to cope with what life has in store for us. Self-esteem is focused on whether we feel we are worthy and whether we feel we have a right to be who we are and to value who we are without being constantly criticised for who we are. The value we place on ourselves is critical to our sense of self worth.

Building self-esteem in your son is essential to him taking his place in this society as a valued member of this society, able to contribute meaningfully, effortlessly and willingly.

With so many pressures visited on our sons from a range of quarters it’s essential that they are encouraged to have minds of their own and to act on what they know to be right. For some, the idea of rightness, right thinking and right acting may be an old fashioned concept and yet I maintain it’s at the heart of building high self-esteem.

Central to the theme of rightness is acting for the good of all to the best of our abilities. These are high ideals I know and here are seven great steps to help moms engender this way of thinking in their sons (much of this is of course applicable to daughters as well).

1. Praise often, criticise rarely, if ever

With praise so many things are possible. Sons really get the impression they can do anything when they are praised and shown how to succeed. Have you noticed how joyous children are when they are really celebrated and told `well done’, `good boy’, `you can do it – brilliant’ and then how they wilt under scathing criticism – `bad boy’, `you’re useless’, `you’re rubbish and a waste of space’, `you are just like your father, you won’t amount to anything’.

Both ways are self-fulfilling prophecies – if you tell your son often enough that he is a waste of space and will amount to nothing good, then he will live down to that expectation. If on the other hand you tell him how great he is then he is more likely to live up to those expectations. I know these are quite simplistic observations of more complex ideas about the way we behave and yet I hope I’ve put across the message about the importance of praise, praise and even more praise.

Take every opportunity to let your son know when he is doing things well, no matter how small it is, no matter if you feel he should be doing it anyway. The more praise the better.

Criticism diminishes the soul. It makes us feel bad about ourselves. It makes us, even adults feel unworthy and not good enough. Imagine how your son would feel if he’s constantly criticised. A son that is constantly criticised has the ability to be a first rate bully. We know for the most part that bullies have low self-esteem and continued criticism helps to lead to a poor self-image.

I am not suggesting that you shouldn’t tell your son when he has done something wrong. Of course there is a place for this. The question is; how is this done? It can be done in a way that keeps their self-esteem intact. That is tactfully letting them know that their behaviour isn’t appropriate, whilst at the same time telling them know how you would like them to behave instead. Sit and talk to your son and find out how he feels about what you have said to him, this will help him to maintain his sense of self, his sense of wellbeing because he is being treated like he matters.

Praise your son early, often and throughout his life and just watch his face light up.

I sing a song to my son every night at the point of putting him to bed, with the words, `you are so beautiful to me, can’t you see, you are so beautiful to me’, my beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy’ he loves it and just watching his face light up at `our’ song is a wonder.

Some `to do’ ideas

* Constantly look out for things your son is doing well and let him know how good he is and how much you love him.

* Tell him some of the things that you like about him specifically.

* Find out some of the things that he likes about himself and that he feels he’s good at.

2. Help to ensure your son understands and knows the power of his own mind (rather than bowing to peer pressure) The pressure is on boys and young men to conform to peer pressure, to follow the pack rather than taking mastery of their own mind.

What makes the difference between a follower and a leader?

A follower is someone who hasn’t a mind of their own, is insecure, rarely makes decisions, doesn’t take responsibility for their own actions and doesn’t respect themselves or others. A leader on the other hand is the opposite of all of these.

Ensuring your son understands the power of using his own mind is really important and it is necessary to nurture this at a young age.

Some of the things that will help have already been mentioned. To help your son to feel he is loved, this needs to be demonstrated to him every day through loving words and action, `I love you’ and a hug goes a very long way, particularly when done consistently. Allow your son to make age appropriate decisions. Not all decisions need to be in the hands of parents – so what if he wants to choose what pyjama’s he wears to bed tonight – that’s fine, let him make that decision. Decision making becomes easier the more we do it.

Let him know that all actions have consequences – if he chooses to behave well in school there is a consequence, usually a reward for that. If he chooses to behave poorly at school there is a consequence for that too, usually some form of punishment. He needs to know he has choices and that he will take responsibility for those choices throughout his life. Providing him with a loving, nurturing foundation will help him to make some of the more appropriate choices. I have a saying that I use with my son which is, `stop yourself’. The reason I use this expression is really to give him an insight at a very early stage that he is responsible for stopping or initiating appropriate action in his life.

Some `to do’ ideas

* Talk with your son about the peer pressure he faces in this society and how he feels about what should be done about it. This will support him to think through some strategies for himself if he feels under pressure.

* Engage in role play activities that help your son work through the alternatives.

2. Give age appropriate tasks

Instilling in your son a sense of responsibility at a very early age will help him to take responsibility later in life. Simple things such as taking the potty to the bathroom, setting the table, washing up, helping with the cooking, emptying the trash etc. helps to let him know life is about being responsible and that being responsible is actually quite easy and is managed one task at a time.

I know some of us as mothers think that we can get things done more quickly if we do it ourselves. And that may be partly true in the short term. In the medium and long term however if we teach our son age appropriate tasks then life becomes a lot easier and we teach them to take responsibility for themselves and their life at the same time.

Some simple and responsible tasks include, keeping their bedroom tidy, placing their dirty clothes in the linen basket, placing clothes in the washing machine. If some of these tasks are introduced early enough the children actual enjoy `helping’. I know as our sons get older `other’ incentives might need to be employed – seeing friends, going on outings, money, negotiations etc.

Some `to do’ ideas

* Every couple of days, give your son a new task to do – something that is a little more stretching than the previous task.

* Notice when you are getting a little impatient with the time he is taking to do the task – allow him that time and you get on with something else – this will be of great benefit to you in the long run.

3. Participate in games that build high self-esteem

Building self-esteem doesn’t always come easy, particularly if it wasn’t started at a very young age.

If you are able to, it would be great to get your son to sign up to societies/groups like, martial arts, boy scouts, youth clubs, mentor programmes and outward bound courses. These are great building blocks for increasing self-esteem. Here they get to take part in individual and group activities that help to stretch them beyond where they are.

These activities will help to instil a strong sense of self and achievement. The belief this will to give your son in himself really is the bedrock from which self-esteem springs.

One of the great things we can do as moms is to sometimes just get out of the way of our sons and watch them soar. Let’s be careful not to pass our own fears on to them, be brave enough to let them find their own level – to fall down and pick themselves up again.

In addition, games are a great way to support boys to build self-esteem……….

Here are some `to do’ game ideas to practice with your son:

* Boys are good at…………… I am good at…………….

* With your son’s agreement sit with trusted family members and tell your son all the wonderful things you and your family love about him – the one key `rule’ here is that all comments must be positive.

* If I knew it was impossible to fail, I would…………………………..(you and your son, independently can finish the sentence)

4. Your son can make age appropriate decisions with your help

Talk to him at a very early stage about decision making and why it is important to help in living the life he wants to live. Someone once said, `at the point of your decision your destiny is shaped’ and I do believe this to be true.

Making decisions and the decisions we make have a real impact and make a huge difference to our lives.

Decision making is a natural part of growing up, imparting this in our sons at an early age helps to enable them to take decisions as they get older.

Decision making can start at a very early age – do you want milk or water? Do you want to play with this toy or that? Who do you want to baby-sit for you – this auntie or that un

Some `to do’ ideas

* Each day ask your son to make a decision, make it a decision that you believe it will be easy for him to make

* Let your son you believe he is a good decision maker and that tell him how much you value his decisions

5. Develop your own self-esteem and show your son exactly what you mean

It’s really great to lead by example. How is your self-esteem? How do you feel about yourself? Do you feel you are a worthwhile and valuable person? How do you show this to your son?

If you know your self-esteem is on the floor, maybe there is some work you could consider doing on yourself. Our sons will learn from us, they will learn from what we say, from what we do, from what we say we are going to do, from what we say and don’t do. Be in no doubt, our children really do learn from us.

Some `to do’ ideas

* Read personal development books: any by Anthony Robbins, Iyanla Vanzant, Marianne Williamson, Norman Vincent Peale, Deepak Chopra and Shakti Gawain are great starting points.

* Enrol in some personal development workshops

* Establish a women’s group with your friends * Become part of an already established women’s group

* Do something your haven’t done before

6. Get to know your son and instil in him strong personal values Let your son know what you believe in and what your mission and vision is for your family. Let him know from an early age, using age appropriate language, so that he can to develop that mission and vision and fully sign up to the values you are keen to instil in him. Help your son to be proud to be male. There are lots of great role models out there, present day and throughout history. Let him know who they are. Role models will be different for different people and there no point in necessarily pointing them out here. Find those that fit with your value structure and let your son know about these role models and tell him why you consider them to be role models. Ensure that you don’t put men down around him (or at all if you can bear to help it). Remember they hear our negative comments about men and internalise it. They can feel worthless. As we love our sons dearly, this is not what we really want to be doing. Labelling is a very powerful process, it can build self-esteem and it can shatter it. Support your son by having positive male role models around him. If you feel there aren’t any in your immediate surroundings then there are a good number of mentors. Better still; enrol him in a mentor programme. Here are some great examples of personal values: aspire to be the best you can be, dedication and commitment to all you choose to do and be, communicating respectfully, treat yourself and others well, family is important and respect the diversity in that our world offers.

Some `to do’ ideas * Draw up a list of personal values that you believe are important.

* Write up this list and place it at strategic points around your house.

* Review your personal values every six months or so and make sure you feel they are still current – you may wish to add or delete!!!!!!!!

7. Your son must know you are his safety net if he falls Your son really does need to know that if all else fails and mistakes are made (as they inevitably will); he won’t go completely crashing to the ground. Ultimately he needs to know you are there for him and will support him in whatever way you can. Hyacinth Fraser Author Live playfully, powerfully and lovingly

Hyacinth is a Master NLP Practitioner and Master Hypnotherapist. She also has a M.A. in Social Policy and Administration

In addition most recently she has started a parenting website, with a key focus on single mothers raising sons. She is a mother of a two year old son.

She has written an ebook – Discover how you can be a great single mother to your son by following these 101 strategies and tips to great parenting.

October 5, 2013 at 2:35 pm Leave a comment

Babies died 7 things NOT to write in a baby bereavement card

stillbirth baby funeral prayers7 things NOT to write in a baby bereavement card Babies died.

when a baby has died its the hardest type of bereavement to cope with, after researching many mums and dads  feelings after a babies death here are the findings of what not to write in  baby bereavement card .

  1. so sorry for your baby loss better luck next time
  2. i heard about your sad death of baby, maybe you’ll have another next year
  3. don’t worry you will have plenty more babies in the future
  4. in sympathy of the death of your baby
  5. so sad to hear baby died but you have to move on and forget about it
  6. I heard that baby died how about a nice cup of tea to get over it
  7. with best wises Forget that this as ever happened, you can try again for another baby next month.

you can find suitable messages for cards here


October 4, 2013 at 9:02 am Leave a comment

Maceration fetal demise Intrauterine fetal Death

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????Maceration and the Timing of Intrauterine fetal Death


this blog post contains sad news about fetal demise death and maceration if it is likely to cause any upset please press your back button now.


Sometimes an ultra sound scan determines that baby has sadly passed away in the womb. Delivery may occur naturally in few days or the pregnancy can be induced to deliver baby sooner and prevent any infection occurring inside the womb.

You may have heard the term Maceration of a fetus invetro

Maceration is the process of tissue degeneration which begins to occur as soon as an undelivered baby dies.

You may be scared at seeing baby that has been dead a few days in the womb.The midwives are very supportive and can explain in detail what baby will look like upon delivery to aliveate any fears you may have.

For very tiny babies they will be fragile so pick an outfit that had gentle openings you can find them easily at the tiny baby bereavement department of Cheeky Chums They will deliver quite quickly too to UK addresses.

references taken from Richard M. Pauli, M.D., Ph.D.

September 18, 2013 at 6:00 pm Leave a comment

types of pregnancies a baby growing or is there

61447_10151094690256930_791562549_ntypes of pregnancies a baby growing or is there?

on very rare occasions a different type of pregnancy  can occur which results in loss.

Today we look at the different types of non viable pregnancies.

Complete molar pregnancy. An egg with no genetic information is fertilized by a sperm. The sperm grows on its own, but it can only become a lump of placental tissue (hence a positive pregnancy test). It cannot  become a fetus. As this tissue grows, it looks  like a cluster of grapes. This cluster of tissue can very rapidly fill the uterus.


Partial molar pregnancy. An egg is fertilized by two sperm. an abnormal embryo does begin to develop, it will quickly die because of the rapidly growing mass of abnormal tissue filling the uterus.


Molar pregnancy is assessed with a pelvic exam and ultrasound.  The abnormal placenta mass will have a clustered, grape like appearance.

blighted ovum pregnancy

A blighted ovum means that a fertilized egg has attached itself to your uterine wall, but the embryo (baby) did not develop. Cells developed to form the placenta and the amniotic sac, but not the embryo itself.


While a positive pregnancy test detects the placenta hormones (not an actual baby), because is a blighted ovum, your body may display signs of pregnancy, and may actually sustain the growing placenta for a short time.  You may not know you have a blighted ovum until an ultrasound confirms it, or you may miscarry naturally before an ultrasound is performed.

The fact that a blighted ovum does not result in a baby can be  more devastating than any other kind of miscarriage.

Ectopic pregnancy

An ectopic pregnancy is a complication of pregnancy in which the embryo implants outside the uterine cavity With rare exceptions, ectopic pregnancies are not viable. they are dangerous for the mother, since internal hemorrhage is a life-threatening complication. Most ectopic pregnancies occur in the Fallopian tube.  implantation can also happen in the cervix, ovaries, and abdomen. An ectopic pregnancy is a  medical emergency, and, if not treated properly, can lead to death.

In a normal pregnancy, the fertilized egg enters the uterus and settles into the uterine lining where it has plenty of room to divide and grow.



September 17, 2013 at 11:00 am Leave a comment

baby born with FASD fetal alcohol spectrum disorders

natural birth 10baby born with FASD fetal alcohol spectrum disorders

One of the questions often asked is can you have a small glass of wine or drink alcohol whilst pregnant?

Well think of it is way if one glass one day is ok then one glass another day is ok when would it stop? if alcohol damages a growing fetus in cases of fasd  then no alcohol should be drunk.

what is FASD

fetal alcohol spectrum disorders (FASDs) are a group of conditions that can occur in a baby whose mother drank alcohol during pregnancy. These effects can include physical problems and problems with behavior and learning. Often, a person with an FASD has a mix of these problems.

A baby with an FASD might have:

  • Abnormal facial features, such as a smooth ridge between the nose and upper lip (this ridge is called the philtrum)
  • Small head size
  • Shorter-than-average height
  • Low body weight
  • Poor coordination
  • Hyperactive behavior
  • Difficulty paying attention
  • Poor memory
  • Difficulty in school (especially with math)
  • Learning disabilities
  • Speech and language delays
  • Intellectual disability or low IQ
  • Poor reasoning and judgment skills
  • Sleep and sucking problems as a baby
  • Vision or hearing problems
  • Problems with the heart, kidneys, or bones

September 16, 2013 at 7:32 pm Leave a comment

weaning baby 7 baby food ideas for babies under 7 months

weaning baby 7 baby food ideas for babies under 8 months

Baby food, baby eatingin this weeks news some  shop bought baby foods my not be  nutrient rich as they should be with lots of sugar being added which rots baby teeth even new ones. making your own baby food is easy peasy for weaning young babies under 7 months.

here are 7 baby food ideas for weaning babies

  • ground up porridge oats with bottle or breast milk use a blender make them very fine before adding a baby bottle do not make it too watery to start weaning process.
  • potato and parsnip mash boil fresh veg then blend
  • potato carrots and parsnip mash cook veg then mash together.
  • broccoli and cauliflower cook vegetables then blend add cooked pasta as baby moves on to eat thicker solids
  • mango and banana split use ripe mango blend with a banana
  • apple and pear boil in a pan until fruit becomes soft
  • baby rice with cooked apricot use breast milk or bottle to mix with rice then add cooked apricot

September 11, 2013 at 12:40 pm Leave a comment

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